moving forward

navigating through the life that was and moving into the life that is

A little bit hard…

on November 18, 2011

The kids saw Sandra last night, and it seems to be a mixed blessing.  I know they love seeing her, and I think it really helps her, too.  The aftermath is tough, though.  Steak ‘n’ Shake made the wrong milkshake for Alana.  After the long trip there, by Grandpa and Uncle Tom,  no one really wanted to go back.  Mint Oreo – that’s not hard, is it?  It’s a green one, they sent a red one, with M & Ms.  She wouldn’t even taste it!  Pretty big meltdown followed.  When she began to scream “It isn’t fair!” and “I want it back!” we knew it wasn’t about the shake.  My heart was broken watching her throw the pillows off the bed and attempt to strip it of sheets and blankets.  I tried to be Sandra – encouraging her to breathe and count – but I am not Sandra.  All Alana knows is that Sandra is not with her, and I desperately want to fix it.  I can’t, though, so I waited and, perhaps against the experts recommendations, I had a thought.  Zesto’s!  Doug drove desperately up to Zesto’s.  I think the woman was probably terrorized when he dashed in and asked her if she had mint, followed by “what about Oreos?”  The funny part, and we are always glad for the funny parts, is when he arrived back at the house.  He had a large shake and told me to come into the kitchen under the auspices of putting it in a smaller glass.  Really, though, he wanted to know if it was green enough.  We discussed adding food color, but opted to let Alana taste it.  She liked it!  Thank you, God.

-Aunt Margot

4 responses to “A little bit hard…

  1. Kim Carter says:

    So glad Alana got her Mint Oreo shake! You guys are doing a great job. Keep up the good work.

  2. Jewell says:

    Margo, God Bless you! and all those who love the children – tears in my eyes, so I marvel at you and said a prayer that you will always “know just what to do” (especially LOVE, love, love them) Jewell

  3. Oh Margot — I wish I could just give you a huge hug. You and your husband are doing such a wonderful job. I know it’s tough to deal with the little one’s emotions – on top of everything else. God Bless.

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